Priorities, Man

Much has been made about “privacy” over the last four decades. The discussion of “Privacy” is invoked most commonly to protect a Man’s right to sexual debase or exploit Women. In an online environment, with the rapid expansion of data now available from a simple Google search and the willingness of individuals to volunteer their information, calls for “Privacy” (from Men) are becoming even louder, as Men apparently seek the right to discuss all manner of disgusting perversion without having Women notice or comment on it. The topic of “Privacy” is an important concept for feminists to parse, because it does not work for Women.

What, exactly, does “Privacy” mean for Women?

Does it mean Women have the right to control conversations that occur about them?

Clearly, this is not what “Privacy” means.

Does it mean Women have the right to exclude Men from our spaces?

Clearly, this is not what “Privacy” means.

Does it mean that Women have the right to engage in whatever conduct we choose without having to be subjected to conversations about it?

Clearly, this is not what “Privacy” means.

Does “Privacy” mean the right to name that which oppresses us without interference?

Ha! No. Of course not.

So what does “Privacy” mean and, more importantly, who benefits from it? Continue reading

Advertisements

My Womb Is Not A Football For You

“Mothers don’t kill their children unless they are very ill,” said Diane Sanford, a psychologist who has written two books on postpartum depression.”They believe they are protecting their children from having a life of misery and suffering.”

“Motherhood is near to divinity. It is the highest, holiest service to be assumed by mankind.” ― Howard W. Hunter

“…One of the reasons so many women say “I’m not a feminist but…” (and then put forward a feminist position), is that in addition to being stereotyped as man-hating Amazons, feminists have also been cast as antifamily and antimotherhood.” ― Susan J. Douglas

“So how on earth can I bring a child into the world, knowing that such sorrow lies ahead, that it is such a large part of what it means to be human? I’m not sure. That’s my answer: I’m not sure.” ― Anne LamottOperating Instructions: A Journal of My Son’s First Year

The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness. -Honoré de Balzac

The hand that rocks the cradle
Is the hand that rules the world.

-W. R. Wallace

Many months ago, my friend Phonaesthetica wrote a blog post about Women contemplating Motherhood and Mothers and their Sons. As the Mother of a Son, I enjoyed the post.

As a Mother of a Son, I am sometimes discomfited by discussions about  Male Violence or its inevitability (and I do not believe in the inevitability of Male Violence).  Discussions about Male Violence, however, are important and necessary to Women’s Liberation and we have lots of them here and here. And we need to have them, no matter how much our personal bias makes us feel uncomfortable.

This isn’t a blog post about Mothers and Sons or Male Violence.  Continue reading

Trust Women, Even When It Is Impossible

All women are damaged.  Damage is injury or harm that reduces us.

You, woman, are damaged.

Does this offend you? Do you believe you are not damaged, that you are somehow immune to the forces at work that make women hate each other?

You are lucky.

Who WOULDN’T be damaged? Damage to women is both a direct goal of male supremacy and a by-product of living in a woman-hating culture.

I don’t blame women for this damage. Continue reading

Rational Misogyny

One of my favorite philosophers, if one actually has favorite philosophers,  is David Hume. If you don’t know David Hume, watch this helpful video.

David Hume was an Empiricist. Empiricism is the idea that you derive “knowledge” from EVIDENCE.  EVIDENCE includes facts, information, and data that demonstrates that a particular belief is “true” or valid.

Continue reading

There Is No Opt-In; You Cannot Opt-Out

Recently, a few real world interactions with women got me thinking about how oblivious we as Women can be to the reality that Patriarchy and Woman-Hating informs every move we make and every thought we have.

Hopefully, readers of this blog have already accepted that Patriarchy damages every last one of us, that this damage influences how we act and who we are, and that we should work to correct this damage, if only to live life as honestly as possible under Patriarchy.

Continue reading